I’m all about working to have a positive money mindset but am guilty of sometimes ignoring my business mindset. I’ve learned that they’re both DEFINITELY related, though. There are certain business specific things that merit their own head space. It’s a challenge to identify these issues and then actively work to correct them, but it’s worth it.
I’ve started to recognize when I’m self-sabotaging when the success I actively create shows up.
For me, the self-sabotage has showed up in the form of resentment. I noticed when I’ve had waves of new client sign ups and thousands of dollars coming in all at once, instead of my brain celebrating this and OWNING the success I created, it defaulted to resentment.
Resentment of all the “haters” who haven’t supported me, who’ve said homophobic/transphobic things to my online, the few friends who’ve stopped being in my life once I became a business owner, and resentment of all the people who didn’t value my services.
This resentment does nothing to grow my business or help me feel safe. In order to deal with massive sums of money coming in in a short time, my brain’s way of dealing with this influx was to bring me back down to where I used to be. Because resentment is something I’ve felt almost all my life, and it’s comfortable. It’s easier to be resentful than grateful when that’s what you’ve seen modeled growing up.
Through therapy and coaching, I’ve learned that being resentful of my resentment doesn’t help. But I can recognize when and WHY it shows up so it doesn’t dominate my decisions as much.
The book The Big Leap has also helped me recognize when the resentment shows up. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is looking to improve not only their business mindset, but their overall approach to life.
This book helped me realize that self sabotage is rooted in false beliefs that we adopt from our childhoods. Here are four of them, in my cliffnotes version:
The False Beliefs That…
- You’re fundamentally flawed in some way. Watch out for offsetting or fucking things up when you do good things. Good things DO deserve to happen to you, hunty!
- By succeeding, we’re being disloyal to and leaving people behind. DO NOT sabotage yourself because you think you’re cheating on your roots. You deserve to soar into the stratosphere.
- You’re a burden and a celebration at the same time. What I have to remind myself of is that I’m NOT a burden on anyone. I help so many people. You do, too. Your success will NOT make you a bigger burden.
- You must dim your bright lights so you don’t overshadow someone from my past. You need to let this go to thrive in your ZONE OF GENIUS! (cue evil laugh)
Whenever we worry about something on our wealth building journeys, the book has taught me is to respond by thinking “What positive thought is trying to emerge from the worry?” That simple reframe has been huge for my mindset as a business owner and just as a human intent on enjoying life.
The book also talks about the concept of Einstein Time. Instead of saying “I don’t have enough time,” think: “I AM the source of time. I have been creating time forever,” and you’ll see time with less scarcity and more abundance.
Lastly, listen to your body. When my knees went out out of nowhere after years of being a runner, I took it as a sign that my knees told me I needed to change something. That I needed to stop running and heal. Since then, I’ve started loving myself unconditionally and focusing on the ways my body can still move once I give it time to heal.
Healing is an everyday part of owning a business. I’m prioritizing working on my business mindset to continue to grow and build. I DO deserve success. And I can do it with a business model that also helps marginalized communities.
I love seeing other BIPOC entrepreneurs share their successes online because it reminds me that I’m not out here alone. There are many other bad ass business owners creating the change we want to see in the world.
Recently Jannese from Yo Quiero Dinero shared her revenue numbers, and it inspired me to do the same.
Looking at these sales numbers is a tangible reminder of my success. It’s easy to forget all the small decisions that get you to your goals. Having something to reflect on is helpful when your business mindset is feeling sluggish. I’m also a firm believer that there is always more to learn. Because of this I will never stop going to therapy and seeking coaching. Investing in these areas will reap benefits for years to come just like investing in the stock market provides me with financial independence.
If you’re ready to talk money mindset, book a call with me. Let’s tackle your goals together and get you to where you want to be.